Sandals Resort - Love Is All You Need ™

    In the late 1990's I was a travel agent. 
   At that time, it was the beginning of the end for about 90 percent of brick-n-mortar agencies. So I ended up at a lot of different agencies, in a very short time, due to the mass consolidating and closings. But before all of that, I was at an agency in Seattle located in the Trade Center, on the waterfront, directly across from the Spaghetti Factory restaurant.

 Now in 2018, the Trade Center is Zulily Headquarters, and the Spaghetti Factory is in the process of becoming apartments? Condo's? (Eye Roll) Either one, this is Seattle.

Ding ding!

  





Back then I was young and unmotivated as a worker. (As opposed to me now, old and unmotivated as a worker. )
  But my boss really believed in me, and decided one day, that I should become a specialist in something. She had Club Med, Neil had business travel. Voula had cruises...but what did I have? I had nothing but a brochure, and a keen eye for reading that brochure.
   So one day the boss asked me if I want to go to an all day Sandals seminar, because she thought Sandals could be MY specialty. Of course I said yes. It was all glitz and glamour at every Sandals location in the Caribbean. I knew this was what I had been waiting for...An over the top rich couple's private resort retreat! I was all in.

  The first thing they handed me when I arrived at the seminar, was a BIG binder, full of glossy photos of happy couples enjoying the all inclusive amenities. There were sections for each of the resorts...and I spent the rest of the day drinking the Sandals kool-aid.
 In the end, I really did learn a lot. And I hoped to one day use my new found knowledge to book the beautiful people into any one of the 8 Sandals, or 2 Beaches luxury resorts.

  But alas, shortly thereafter my boss sold the business. Beginning my transient crawl through the dregs of a dying industry.

  So that was the end of that...or so I thought. For some reason...that I do not remember. I wrote a little story. I think I wrote it and gave it to my boss after the seminar, to show her what I had learned. As time went by, it got thrown in a box and forgotten. I recently found it...and well it's pretty silly and maybe a little funny. So I thought I would share it. Keep in mind I have a very whimsical sense of humor, and apparently at the time a love of quotation marks - Jolie

Sandals - Love is all you need ™

Sandals Royal Jamaica - The first morning of my ultimate, all inclusive stay at Sandals Royal Jamaica begins as I open my eyes. Fabio, my fiancee and I, will be getting married right here today at 2 pm, but more on that later.

I look over at Fabio, who is still sleeping in our luxurious king bed, that is located in our "Grand Luxe Beachfront Room". As I look around the room, my eyes come to rest on each one of the special amenities that make our accommodations truly "ultra luxurious".

   The rooms are something special! King sized beds (on a request basis only at Beaches) a/c, hairdryers, telephones, private bath, and shower, safe, clock radio, and satellite t.v. (it's the 90's folks, having a clock radio was still a big thing.)

Of course, if my fiancee wasn't so cheap, we could have gotten "Exclusive Suite Concierge Service"' and I would have been privy to a "Suite Concierge Center V.I.P Check In" and special luggage handling, a private cocktail party, and a "Suite Concierge," who is completely dedicated to fulfilling all of my personal needs.

 (I wonder if he would have satisfied my need for...ooops! I forgot I'm getting married this afternoon.)

Anyway, I think they meant guaranteeing dinner reservations, arranging for local tours, and car rentals. Daily NY Times faxes are available. (ha ha faxes) As well as providing an in-room bar. 

Look at him sleeping so cheaply...I mean so peacefully. On second thought, with his drinking problem, maybe an in-room bar is not such a good idea.

 Anyway did I mention I'm getting married at 2pm?

Sandals had the perfect idea of combining the wedding and the honeymoon together to form "The Weddingmoon". 

My Sandals wedding consultant put together the perfect package for our budget. It includes the marriage certificate, and my own personal wedding coordinator (I didn't see much of her though, she kept saying she needed to measure Fabio for his tuxedo, and it didn't seem to matter to her that he had already brought one from home.) 

 Anyway, the weddingmoon package also includes our wedding reception, with decorated area.

2 tiered wedding cake, flower bouquet and boutonniere. 5 x 7 wedding photo, and professional video. And last but not least is a honeymoon candlelight dinner for myself, and my new husband, and continental breakfast the next morning. 

Now I'm not sure of the actual cost of ours, but I do know that the minimal cost of the package begins at 750.00.

I still have hours to kill before 2pm and this big lug is sleeping like a baby. 

Lucky for me Sandals has a fitness program that makes getting into shape fun...I think I'll start out at Sandal's lavish fitness center, with the state of the art equipment. 

Then I'll let all of my stress evaporate in the authentic wood-paneled steam room. After that I'll relax some more, in the invigorating swirling whirlpool. Or the oriental hot and cold plunge baths. 

If I hurry I'll have time for an aerobics class. Both regular and water. 

But before I work out, I think I'll go diving. It's great I hear. All Sandals dives are guided depth, ranging from 30 to 90 feet. And since I'm certified, I can dive twice daily. Fabio is not certified, so he can only dive once a day. 

It's so beautiful here! They even have wreck dives at most Sandals.

The Titanic! 

The only requirement is that I have to show proof of certification and they provide the equipment.

There's so much to do here, golf, windsurfing, snorkeling, kayaking, playing that giant chessboard...boy all this exercise is working up my appetite. 

Lucky for us Sandals is the ultimate in gourmet dining. Breakfast is buffet style. With made to order omelettes.

JK Not Sandals breakfast buffet

 

 Or for those of you who disco till dawn. (like Fabio) He can catch an a' la carte meal in " The Courtyard " from 8am to 11am. Or he can order room service, continental style only, from 7am to 10am. Lunch is also buffet style, but they do have entrees cooked to order. Lunch is served from 12:30pm until 2pm, and anytime snacks are served from 11am to 5pm, and 11pm to 3am, at "The Beach Grill".

I have to say here at Sandals, dinner is my favorite meal of the day. It's fun to get dressed up in formal, and semi formal attire, no beachwear, tank tops or bare feet allowed. 

(Fabio finally understood that he had to put a shirt on, but I had to speak very slowly, and repeat myself many times.) 

The coolest restaurant is the Bali Hai. It's decorated in ultra luxurious Indonesian style, and I had some uniquely extraordinary cuisine.

The other three restaurants are "The Regency (international) indoor, outdoor dining over looking the ocean."The Pavilion" (Jamaican) Exciting Jamaican cuisine in a tropical setting under the stars.

Last but not least is " The Courtyard" for grilled specialties, open rotisserie and salad bar.

The wonderfully informative staff here at Sandals said that there's going to be a lot of entertainment. (which is what I need because just sitting around watching Fabio flex his muscles is getting a little boring, know what I mean?) Anyway when we got here the general manager had a welcome party with cocktails. He told us that every night there's a show with Caribbean and international entertainment. There's always disco and karaoke.

 Later in the week, Sandals will host a charity bingo, and a charity casino night. 

Razzmatazz Night (I'm not sure what that is but I'm sure Fabio would love to help out) and 2 theme nights. Caribbean Night and Formal Night (oh great were going to have to have the shirt talk again.) 

Behold! my semi-formal attire.

Well between getting married, working out, enjoying all of the land and water sports. Going to the golf course, swimming, going to the ultra lavish beach. Eating exotic foods. Exploring Jamaica, getting blotto on all the free booze, and disco dancing till 3am. Sandals is one hell of an all inclusive vacation. Remember...

Love is all you need. ™ 

Jolie Shanoian